What Was I Made For?
by Pastor Celeste Gonzales
What am I here for? This question echoed through my life from childhood into my late twenties. It seemed unfair that others had clear trajectories while I lived in the fog of uncertainty, weighed down by question marks and aimlessness.
Out of that deep longing, I cried out in prayer: “Lord, how can I be at this point in my life and still not know why I’m here?” The Holy Spirit gently impressed on my heart:
“You don’t know because it’s too big for you. Your job is to walk through every door I open for you. One day, you’ll wake up and say, ‘How did I get here?’”
Those words brought a peace I hadn’t known. Just because I didn’t have a plan didn’t mean God didn’t have one.
Over time, I discovered that God’s purpose for my life wasn’t about a title, a position, or something to achieve—it was about knowing Him. That realization changed everything. I learned to trust Him, to hear Him, and to lean on Him. I stopped measuring my worth by the world’s moving targets and began embracing the truth that my purpose is renewed every morning. It’s not about a fixed destination but a daily journey of relying on His provision and direction.
And just as He promised, at the end of every year, I find myself marveling: “Wow! I’m so glad I didn’t know what this year would bring.” God, in His sovereignty and love, fulfills His purposes in and through me as I seek Him—the Knower—more than the knowing.
As I reflect on 2024, my heart shouts, “WOW, God!”
This year, I:
Faced a breast cancer diagnosis.
Felt God carry me through surgery, radiation, and seventy-seven doctor appointments—all the way to a cancer-free report.
Said, see you soon to two dear friends who relocated to heaven.
Weathered financial storms that God transformed into raining blessings.
Released a new book in the middle of my radiation treatments.
Traveled to Budapest, Hungary, for missions.
Made unforgettable memories with my family and new friends.
Ministered wherever God opened doors—from doctors’ offices to this moment with you.
Looking back, I thank God I didn’t know what was ahead. If I had, I might have been paralyzed by fear or pride. Instead, He showed me how to glorify Him in every moment, without tying my calling or identity to titles, stages, or achievements I couldn’t sustain. Our true purpose isn’t found in a plaque on the door, a following, or a paycheck. It’s found in doing the will of the Father—even if that means being still for a season.
As much as I love to plan, I’ve come to trust the beauty of not knowing what’s next. Truthfully, it’s none of my business what God wants to do.
Your purpose is too big for you, too.
If you’re feeling lost or unsure, let me encourage you: be found in His presence, for His pleasure. God’s kindness can bring purpose through every difficulty and disappointment. You may not have all the answers, but you can trust the One who does.
As we step into 2025, let’s walk each day on purpose, for His purpose. Whatever comes, let’s glorify Him through it all.
Therefore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all things for the glory of God.
1 Corinthians 10:31 NASB